When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
when sorrows like sea billows roll;
whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well with my soul.

It is well with my soul,
it is well, it is well with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
let this blest assurance control,
that Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
and hath shed his own blood for my soul.

It is well with my soul,
it is well, it is well with my soul.

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

It is well with my soul,
it is well, it is well with my soul.

And, Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
the clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
the trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
even so, it is well with my soul.

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Some Days are Better than other....

Today was a "other" type of day. I work 7p-7a so lets start there. My night at work was absolutely awful. The RNs thought I was going to have to go to ER because they thought I was having a panic attack. My heart rate, bp, respiration, and blood sugar jumped up. I have never had a feeling like that before. I ran the entire night. It was a long awful night; I couldnt get caught up. I was constantly busy. Most nights things die down from 2-4 so I can get caught up on charting and little other things. Not last night. Then my people that relieve me showed up and clocked-in 30 minutes late. It started off rough at 7:30 when I got off and has continued that way. When I got home I checked some of our lovely online "social networking" site (Aka. Blogger.com, Facebook, and Twitter).......skkkkerrrk. Let me back up.

*Sidenote: Somethings happened a few months back that have turned my world upside down. Some days are better than other with coping with what happened. It's a struggle everyday. I hate how good Ive gotten at acting like Im ok, but to be honest I am wreck. Even after three or so months Im still a wreck. Sometimes its a chore just to wake up and sometimes its just an after thought. Today this particular struggle was a huge burden and roadblock. Ok, back to the story.*

Ok, So I checked my normal websites and saw things that triggered the emotions. I was to tired to fight crying so it just happened. I slept from 8:30 until 1:30. When I woke up I immediately started crying. I sobbed. Not like little ones, like ones that make your eyes so red that it looks like someone cold-clocked you in the eyes. I tried to sober and I couldnt. The more I tried to stop cryin, the worse I cried. I went downstairs. My Dad was really worried and at first I couldnt catch my breath to tell him what was wrong. When I finally spoke all I could get out was, "Some days are harder than others." My Dad and I worked out together and that helped so much. Then I got alone again and then began the water works again. So I decided to stop letting myself be alone. I called two friends and invited them over to watch the premier of Chuck. We didnt do anything, but it was the pick me up I needed. We ate, talked, and watched t.v. It meant the world to me that one of them came over just because I told him I had a bad day.

Yes, now that I am alone, I am crying again. I know that I am a strong person, but sometimes it doesnt feel that way. Sometimes I feel like I can't get out of bed. Today was one of those days. So all I am asking is for prayers. Pray that I can get over this hurdle. Pray that my heart can heal. Thank you for your prayers. Today wasnt a great day, but tomorrow is a clean slate. Tomorrow is a different day. Tomorrow just like today is a gift from God. Tomorrow is just what I need.

"Just thinking about tomorrow
cleares away the cobwebs and the sorow
'till their none
when i'm stuck with a day that's gray and lonely
i just think of my chin and grin and say oh
the sun'll come out tomorrow
so you gotta hang until tomorrow
come what may
tomorrow tomorrow i love ya tomorrow
your always a day away "

Tomorrow is only 30 minutes away. I love yall. God Bless.

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Things I Love Thursdays

To everything there is a season, and
a time to every purpose under the heavens:
Ecclesiastes 3:1


If I had to live in the same season for the rest of my life it would hands down be Fall. Last year when I was living at Disney, I didnt get to see the seasons change. It was something I missed terribly. They just have three settings hot, hotter, and hottest. There were maybe two or three days that I had to bundle up but not many. I was so sad when I realized that I was going to miss Fall. I decided tonight to blog about why I love fall so here are my reasons I love fall.

*The cool crisp air
*The clouds are wispier
*The sky is a brighter blue
*The days where you can walk out and smell the air and leaves burning
*The corn fields are golden
*The vivid orange, purple, reds, and yellow leaves
*Pumpkins
*Halloween
*Thanksgiving
*Bonfires
*Smores
*Fall Festivals
*Hot Apple Cider and Hot Chocolate
*Fall Retreats
*Candy Corn
*Caramel Apples
*Jackson Orchard
*New Member's Fish Fry at Church
*Perfect weather when long sleeve tshirts are all you need in the day, and bundling up at night makes for wonderful times.
*I get to wear hoodies and zip-up jackets
*Football season
*Hayrides
*Cornmazes
*Grilling out with the family
*Jumping in piles of leaves
*Playing card with Corey and Shannon at Thanksgiving
*Turkey and Dressing
*The smell of baked apple pies, mums, roasted nuts, toasted marshmallows outside and baking pumpkin seeds
*Driving down back roads looking at the trees, smelling the air, looking at old barns, and acting like I have all the time in the world.

Yes, I am ready for fall.

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Simply Blessed

I know it is wordless Wednesday, but I have too many words to say to just post pictures. Tuesday was a eye-opening blessing filled day. I was on my way to school and I have to take a back road. It's a road I know I drive to fast on, but it's a paved wide-open space. I was about 15 minutes down that road and there was a man standing in the middle of the road. I had to stop(obviously), but I had to stop because there has been a crash. There were at least 6 clean-up vehicles. It simply broke my heart when I was finally allowed to go, because I drove over the blood and glass. It hit me. That was someone's blood. I dont know what happened, if the people were ok, or even how many people were involved. All I know is that they were people. I thought. I cried. I prayed. That was all I could because seeing that wreck helped me realize that that could have been me. It could have been me. Seeing that helped me realize that I need to take more opportunities to do things Im not use to doing. Seeing that wreck has impacted my life more in two short days, than 21 years of lectures about "making the most of things." The rest of Tuesday went on as planned. Class, lunch, class and then home. However, I took time to go sit and talk with a friend I ran into instead of sayin, "No. I have to go study." I said yes, and even if I did miss out on some of study time, I wont remember that in a few weeks. I will remember the lunch that I had with that friend. Simply Blessed.

Tuesday night I was invited to go sing at WKU with some fellow Christians. They do it every Tuesday night in the football stadium. I had originally said yes, but when I got home I decided not to go. Well, then I started thinkin about how I am going to start sayin yes more often. So I rechanged(is that a word?) my mind back to yes. So I went to the singing. Not only did I experience a wonderful Spiritual time(which I greatly needed), I made some awesome new friends and hung out with some people that I havent seen sense high school. It never fails that when I hang out with fellow Christians(the ones that actually practice what they preach) I feel so much better. I laughed a whole lot. It felt good simply to smile and laugh; not having to fake it like I have been for months now. There wasn't the cussin, smokin, or pressure to drink like with a lot of my other friends. No one made jokes at me because I was a Christian. These are genuine people whom I can rely on. I havent had that feelin in a long time. And even though we just met, it was wonderful to meet new people who shared beliefs like I do. AND THAT WASNT THE END TO MY DAY! Simply Blessed.

I went to the singing with one of my best friends. He drove. Once we got back to his house, we started talking. We were looking at the stars and simply having a good heart to heart. We went and laid on the hood of my car and talked. We talked about life, death, our choices, and whether or not we think we are going to make it to heaven. You know, the good stuff. It was phenomenal. We talked for a little over 2 hours. When I got home, I simply felt blessed. Simply Blessed.

Today the blessings didnt stop. They came in smaller packages, but nevertheless they came. I got text from friends I havent heard from in a while saying that they valued our friendship and missed me. I got 4 wall post from friends saying that I was missed. I worked out with my Dad, and even though we were out of breath(We walked 2.4 miles) we talked. Then he taught me how to drive the tractor. Its. the small things. I loved being under the sunshine with the breeze blowing and riding the tractor. I just simply rode it around the field again and again and again. I was grinning from ear to ear.Simply Blessed.

Then. I got to go to church. Church is something I look forward to every week, because when I get there I know I am loved. I know that they are my family. Christine Brewer and I teach a class together. We teach the high school, some college, and tonight the middle school girls. I learn from them just as much as I try to teach them. We sang for the first 15 minutes of class tonight and it sounded simply heavenly. I hope these girls are getting just as much out of this class. Simply Blessed.

After church I went to my friend Klents house. We watch Top Chef every week. I love the fact that there was 7 of us there to watch a cooking show just so we could hang out together. We didnt have to fill the silence we all just sat there watching tv, and being content with each other's company. Simply blessed.

I hope you all have a wonderful day. God Bless

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Confused. Simply confused.

WARNING. THIS IS POSSIBLY THE MOST ADD BLOG I HAVE EVER WRITTEN BUT IT CAME STRAIGHT FROM MY HEART. SORRY IF YOU GET WHIPLASH FROM THE SUBJECT JUMPS


I hate that we are suppose to decide at the age of 20 what we are suppose to do for the rest of our lives. We place so much emphasis on a college degree, and how you can only get placed in life if you have one. You know how I feel about that. I think it is a big bunch of BOLOGNA. Plain and simple. Im 21 years old. How in the world am I suppose to know what I want to do when I am 50? I know that you can go back to college and change your major(Which I have already done 3 times now.) I love the medical field. Within my field alone there are hundreds of different jobs. How am I suppose to know which one I am suppose to do? I love working at the hospital, but I also love teaching. I loved substitute teaching preschoolers and elementary school kids. What if I want to do that too? My main reason for not wanting to teach is that they do not get paid enough. But is everything about moneY? I know the answer is no, but I also know it sure does help a lot. I also love to cook. If I could do anything, it would be to quit college and go to culinary school, but there isnt really a good paying job with that unless you start your own business. Then again, I love business and traveling. I would kill to have a job that sent me all over the world to negotiate deals. See. Why? Why at 21 am I suppose to have to pick between the drives that I have when I have so many of them? Sometimes, I feel so hopeless and confused about what I am going to do and if I have picked the right path. If I won the lottery, I think it would fix a lot of my issues. I would be able to get any degree I wanted and not think twice about tuition prices. I could travel to Greece anytime I wanted to or go to Australia for the weekend. I could go to India for kicks and giggles. I could donate money to starving kids, and organizations that dont get enough recognition. Maybe, I should start playin my odds with the lottery. ;)

Whenever I get overwhelmed with thoughts like this, I just wish I had someone to talk to. I may have a lot of good friends, but over the last few months I have lost the people I would call and cry to. Things happen, people make choices, people get in relationships, people grow apart and start their own lives, and people choose other people. I realize this. It's apart of life. It's apart of growing up, but nevertheless it still hurts. I miss my best friend. I miss my close friends. They say, "You can still call me." but it will never be the same. This simply breaks my heart and feel hopeless. Theres a song by Remedy Drive that has helped me a lot in the last few weeks, it hasnt fixed my breaking heart. Only time can do that, but I know it will make me stronger. Here are the lyrics by Remedy Drive, the song is called Hope. Maybe it will help some of you out. I love you all. God Bless

What a beautiful sight for the worn and weary eye
The glimmering light in the corner of a broken sky
Hope sweet hope like a star burning bright
When the sun goes down and the fears begin to fly

Hope’s not giving up
Hope’s not giving up
In a cold dark night she’s not giving
Not giving up

Hold on tight this city’s about to break
In the middle of the night lying there wide awake
Hope sweet hope how much more can she take
Being our strength when our hearts are out of faith

bridge:
Hope is with me in my time of trouble
When it all comes crashing down she will stay
By my side digging through the rubble
She’s not giving up - not giving up - not giving up

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Things I Love Thursdays

Some days it is easier for me to think of things that I love, and when I sit down I have to force myself to think of the positive things in life. I have so much I am blessed with, but today is one of those days where all I can focus on is the negative. We all have those days where we get down. Today is my day to be down. Soooo I am going to make myself talk about one thing that I love. That one thing today is baking.

I know everyone has their one thing that is there stress relief, but I have several and most of them are childish such as playdough and coloring. However, baking is something that can put a smile on my face. I love the process and the final product. I love that when my world seems to be falling apart and there is no method to the madness that I can follow a recipe and I know there is a 99.9% guarantee that I am going to get what I want. I adore that, because sometimes in life when you follow the instructions your life still comes crashing down, but not when you bake. You follow the instructions and you get what you want. So here is my treat for you today. Here is my favorite recipe for cookies

The BEST Butter Cookies:

4 sticks of butter soften
1 1/2 cups of sugar
2 eggs
1 teaspoon of vanilla extract
5 cups of all purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon of salt
2 teaspoons of baking powder

Combing flour, baking powder, and salt: Set aside

Cream butter and sugar in a large mixing bowl until light and fluffy. Beat in eggs and vanilla. Gradually add flour mixture. Mix Well.

Divide dough into four equal pieces form into a ball and then flatten. Wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 3 hours.

Roll out dough, one piece at a time on lightly floured surface to 1/8 inch thickness. Keep remaining dough refrigerated. Cut into desire shapes with floured cookie cutters and place 1 inch apart on ungreased cookie sheets.

Bake 6 to 8 minutes or until lightly browned at 375 degrees. Transfer cookies to wire racks cool before frosting.

Frosting for Cookies:

1/2 cup butter softened
4 cups powdered sugar
4 tablespoons mil
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

Cream butter, gradually add sugar. Beat well. Add milk and vanilla, mixing until smooth.

Enjoy!

God Bless

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Faithful Fridays

Gossip. Its is all something we have done at one time or another. As much as we hate to admit it, it's something we do. Sometimes we talk about others to fit in, or to lift ourselves up. Working with all females, I have learned that gossip is something that happens almost every minute. Sometime it is about each other, and sometimes it is about patients. I was listening to 2 nurses and another tech talk about someone today. I didnt say anything, but I kept my mouth shut. Doesn't that make me just as bad? Just because I laughed at the joke instead of sayin it doesn't make me any less guilty. Its so frustrating because you know that if you are sitting aroun and talking about people, then they are doing to he same about you. Thats a fact. We are going to get takked about. End of Story. We are suppose to lift each other up. So that is my goal this week to not only keep my mouth shut, but to make a stand. I hope you will join me.

God Bless

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